Coming Changes

I have learned firsthand how frustrating it can be when the expectations for a final result don’t match up in the workplace. But let me explain.

I am currently working on a project that I pushed to embark on at work, one that I felt was truly within my remit and should be part of my job. After some initial convincing, I was able to get it approved by the head honchos and off we went. I have come to find out, however, that the end result for the project in my mind and that of the executives in charge may not be singing from the same hymnal, so to speak. I can’t say that it was my lack of understanding or failure to communicate that caused this; it is merely an outright disagreement in how things should work. In the end, I know where I stand, and if I am going to insist that things change, I may have to be the one to initiate it. And so with that, I am thinking outside of the box and outside of the company. On this particular point, I refuse to join them if I can’t beat them.

Thoughts on the Move

Is it bad that after just over a year in a new area and home for us I am thinking of what could be next? Is it bad that I have started to envision that next step for us? But in so doing, the critical question remains: Is that what I really want and is that the best move right now? That is what I need to figure out. I sometimes think yes, that another change could be good. At other times, I think that I am just going through a phase and that it will pass and life will move on where we are now in California, hopefully better than before. Is this partially what a mid-life crisis feels like? What should I be doing and what are my priorities at this point in life for my career and my family? And what about myself? I can’t ignore me, but there is not enough time in the day to do all that I would like. And perhaps there never will be. But how can I keep each of the plates I have spinning in the air in a stable, continuous and healthy balance? I know that I am not the only person to struggle with this question, but the answer for everyone must come on their own in their own time. I must work at finding mine.